So I tried my hand at gambling this weekend, Blog, and I failed miserably.
By "fail" I don't mean I lost tons of money. No. I really only ended up losing about four bucks. I failed because I didn't take risks. As we know, gambling only pays off if you take risks... if it pays off at all. Since I was so staunchly reluctant to insert my precious dollar bills into the machines that were full of chance and numbers and lights, the pay off I experienced was non-existant. Instead I found myself annoyed by the confusion I felt when trying to figure out the nature of the so-called penny slot. I also was experiencing a lot of defeat when it came to loss after loss after loss. After that third loss, I threw my towel in. I don't like not having any control over machines; especially over machines that have a high flash quota about them.
I did find some entertainment in watching a game of blackjack though. However by the time I had gotten to that point in the evening, the smoke that hung in the heavy casino air had started to give me a headache and I had consumed just enough wine to make me sleepy.
Wow. I'd do great in Vegas.
Luckily, the guy I'm dating (yes, I'm actually dating a guy; a real guy who is not six time zones ahead of me at all times and who has a general understanding for things like the horrors Michele Bachmann has to offer our country) was ready to turn in at that point as well, despite his penchant for signing "hit" and "stand" to an overweight yet charming dealer.
I must admit there was part of me that wanted to let loose with some cash and see what I could do. But the timing that this trip to the casino had with things like rent, bills, and when I'm next paid couldn't have been worse. That, and I can't get over the fact that gambling to me is just a form of giving my money away. Granted, I'm giving it away to a Native American culture that has suffered unfairly for hundreds of years at the hands of my very own white ancestors. It's still hard to part with; especially if I'm just getting a chance to hit some lit up buttons and listen to creepy noises reminiscent of a circus in return.
So that was my failed trip to the casino, Blog. Maybe if there is ever a next time in my future for an "opportunity" like this, I'll put myself out there a little more. Maybe casinos can teach me life lessons in risk-taking. But for now, I'm happy with the four bucks I wasted and the several hands of blackjack I witnessed.
In other news, I'm performing this weekend at Huge Theater's "Off Book" production where I am forced to memorize one half of a scene while the other half is improvised by a scene partner who I am to meet mere minutes before we go on together! I'm nervous, excited, scared, and elated that I have a chance to experience this weird and completely original form of theater. This has absolutely nothing to do with casinos outside of the fact that I'm taking a huge risk. The biggest thing is that I know with this risk, I'll receive a great payback not in monetary amounts, but in the satisfaction I will get for making an ass out of myself on stage in front of a paying audience. I'd like to see the opportunity to cash that in at Treasure Island...
And thus Samantha proceeded to further her theatrical nerd-dom by stating satisfaction gained from performing was more valuable than the money that she had previously stated she valued. Sigh.